Like everyone else in social media world, I have watched countless friends share posts about their back-to-school preparations and, eventually, their kids' front-stoop "First Day of School" photos, featuring big, sometimes gap-toothed grins, with backpacks strapped on and lunchboxes in hand.
I love every single one of them! Every single picture.
And I wish each and every one of those kids a fun, safe year ahead.
As a homeschooling family, I must admit that those obligatory back-to-school photos also cause me some internal... discomfort(?)... as I question, again, whether home education is, in fact, the right path for us.
I never planned to homeschool my kids.
I did, however, have extremely strong feelings and expectations about education policy, the classroom environment, and public schools, generally. I always have.... Though, I assumed I would simply fill the role of the over-involved PTA mom.
And yet, here we are, at this moment -- down this unforeseen road -- giving our kids, what I know without a doubt, is a better education than they would receive through public instruction.
It is a personal choice, yes. It is absolutely a decision we made as a family.
And, at the same time, it is a consequence of choices we did not make. It is an outcome of life circumstances.
It is both.
The reasons are many and that is okay.
I am happy we choose to homeschool. I know myself to be a fantastic teacher. And I am confident in our decision.
And still -- those back-to-school pictures....
It is 100% nostalgia --
It is nostalgia with a sprinkling of memories of my own school days.
It is a string of irrelevant thoughts about a life that took a different direction.
And, for a glimmer of a second, those smiling faces cause me to question our current path through our boys' education.
Then --
I see the news flash of another school shooting. Kids gone. Teachers gone. So many lives ruined, forever altered.
I see articles outlining the details of the most recent culture wars. Parents screaming to remove books from school libraries. Kids bullied. Teachers bullied.
I see arguments over school cell phone policies and others pushing to roll-back the integration of technology in the classroom.
I see the fights over curriculum this and testing that....
And I see friends of kids with disabilities, kids with IEPs, who require special education services to meet their academic needs, to even access their education... and those parents invest their time and energy every year, all year, fighting for their kids' services. They wear themselves ragged advocating for what, in many circumstances, should be the bare minimum, but not in school districts with already underfunded programs and in voting districts with underwhelming political will.
No, thank you.
My nostalgia for engaging in the school system lasts precisely one day.
And then, just like that, I am reminded, continuously, exactly why we choose this path for our family.
I will always support a strong public education system. I will always support our local school district. Because I want to live in a country with a strong education system. I want to live in a country that values the schooling of young people.
And who knows? Down the road, we may re-engage with the schools, and I want a strong school district ready to meet us.
But until that day, my sense of nostalgia is just that --
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